Fifty Shades of Grey / Chicken

Now that the official trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey is out and the release date has been announced (Valentine's Day 2015), we're secretly hoping that the best-selling, back-by-popular demand parody cookbook, Fifty Shades of Chicken, will somehow make a cameo appearance in this highly-anticipated film adapted from the original series of novels. 

Truthfully, neither of us has read the novel that indirectly spawned the cookbook. Nevertheless, Fifty Shades of Chicken by FL Fowler (a pseudonym, obvi) keeps us amused and sustains our appetite with its "50 chicken recipes bound to be delicious," food porn photography (we're talking money shots here), and notably, its compelling writing:

"He smells of bacon and imported onions. It's intoxicating. He stares down at me with a hungry look... Slowly he peels me from my wrapper. The plastic comes away, exposing my naked flesh... Slowly and gently, he pushes something deep inside me. It's a lemon from the marinade. It fills me deliciously, as he simultaneously slips two long, knowing fingers within me." 

Not quite Mastering The Art of French Cooking with Julia Child, ladies and gents. In this book, you will find recipes for "Trussed Roasted Chicken with Chorizo Stuffing," "Crispy Chicken Tenders with Cashews and Coconut Curry," and the more traditional "Roast Chicken with Brandy-Vanilla Butter." Each set of instructions is interlaced with short narratives that have double-entendre titles like "Dripping Thighs," "Spread Eagle Chicken," "Hot Rubbed Hen," and many cheeky others. 

While Fifty Shades fans await the release of the film, get yourself a copy of the more interactive Fifty Shades of Chicken to hone the skills you never imagined you could employ on the humble chicken. Explore all its recipes to fulfill your every culinary desire.